Evguenia joins Jess & Brandon to share her personal experience with kink play, polyamory, and energy orgasms. She shares a short erotic story (The Decadent Play Party) from her book, Alice in Polyland and walks Jess & Brandon through a multi-dimensional body scan.
As it was referenced on the podcast, check out Evguenia’s free Healing Body Scan Exercise here.
If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible.
This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns.
Kink, Energy Orgasms & Multi-Dimensional Body Scans
00:00:05 – 00:05:00
You’re listening to the sacs with Dr Jasser podcast sacks and relationship advice you can use tonight Welcome to the sex with Dr. Just podcast I’m your co host Brandon. Wear here with the Doctor Chess O’Reilly and I am here with the we VIBE wand you hold that like you’re going to do some dirty to me with it so this wand is this is not sponsored by the way looks like an Oversized microphone if you’re familiar with the Hitachi magic wand which is a back massager that has been around for decades and has been used for non back massage. There’s purposes this is in my in my opinion an improvement upon that wand by my friends over at we’ve five and it’s it’s just just this beautiful beast that I was GonNa sub in for Brandon’s microphone but I was too late. It looks like that thing is ready for pleasure. Yeah and the the We vibe one you guys should check it out you can go google that is causing a little bit of a storm here at my house because Ria we’ve had a number of people ask to see it to touch it. Yes what it’s all about. Let me be clear. I don’t leave this big sex toy out on my coffee table. It’s just that in Carlisle Johnson from good for her was here a little while back and she. I guess people haven’t seen it yet. So she mentioned it to someone else who mentioned it to someone else and then someone came mm to drop off some equipment at my house unrelated to sex toys and just kinda standing in the doorway. This is this is a friend but a friend of the from social media. But I haven’t met in person person and she said well you have something I want to see and I said Oh. I’m sure I’m sure I do. She said I wanNA see the wand. Because Carla what was talking about it and now I’ve been carrying the one everywhere with me so make sure you check that out. It’s the we want totally unsponsored. Just thought I’d share that with the all other. You’RE GONNA say I cuccia either one but brandon’s upstairs playing with it. Yeah you can leader. If you’d like okay. It’s nice all over the body so today we’re GONNA be talking about a number of topics with our special guests of Kenya from spirit. Sex Lab so of an accredited energy therapist a sex educator cater. She studied at the world’s premier hands on healing program. What is that? What is the world’s premier hands on healing program? It’s called the Barbara Brennan School of Healing. It’s located in Miami and it’s a four year program really really in depth in terms of healing approaches and also personal growth personal transformation. Oh Okay and so. It’s not just about sexuality. Although that’s year airing all yes. You study A lot of things Second Year focuses serology. The and Also Mind Sexual Gardens comes from seven years of experience in polio. Marie and the kink rolled so I kind of build on that as well. You’ve just written a book. Book called Alice in Pali Land and I have been flipping through at first of all. It feels nice between my fingers. I’m big on textures. Today I didn’t do any drugs. Just textures doing it for me today and so each story is an erotic story is it based on real life. Yes each stories stories based on real life experiences and the span different types of Central experiences from King to Hugh threesomes group sex to spiritual sexuality A- domination submission and just exploring polio. Marie and the emotions that come doc and these are real stories they are that you’ve experienced yes and after each story you offer some practical tips if people wanna live out a similar similar fantasy he has because I noticed that Some people are curious about experiencing different things. But they don’t know where to start and people would like to have ideas in terms of what advantages to play out so just wanted to give them kind of Safeway to lead them and guide them into this world of sexualities jollity unfaithfulness. Now you’ve been married for twenty five of years. Yes and for the past seven. You’ve been an ethically mental nominal relationship so poly-amorous Williams and and can you tell us a little bit about that opening up process to move from I’m doing the math eighteen years of monogamy into this last seven year period. Yeah Oh my goodness it was fun I have some funny stories to share and that I come from very conservative backgrounds. Russia Soviet Union. There was no sex. There was no muster bation and I met my husband when I was nineteen. Yes and Throughout our years together I kept them.
00:05:00 – 00:10:02
Fallen in love with people and I was always honest about it but it just didn’t act on it because we were monogamous and thought there was something wrong with me definitely. I spoke to my friend of like listen. They develop feelings for other people. Just like there’s something wrong with you. This is the therapy your friend. Reinforce yes yes in the past there you go so when to see a therapist and I and he said No. We’re going to fix it so we work worked together for four years and I started Sort of the personal growth growth. In the process I enrolled in the school. You have to see their eighteen thousand a year there anyways because if you really need to focus on your stuff you don’t project onto others And four years later there was the finest where he said. Listen I’m in love and lust with you on the therapist and he. It wasn’t going to act on that but it just became so obvious you know. The country transferred the transfers. Typically happen like it happens a lot therapeutic relationships but it’s kind of gave me about lightbulb orbits like Oh my God there’s nothing wrong with me you know and he was also married and so I started reading more about polio. Mery and just speak into people and then they realized he. Hey this is who I am so the therapist disclosed this to you. He did just became too obvious to not young. But then you didn’t see him has a client anymore. No no yeah. We Stop Hugh. He couldn’t handle it like here. Yeah which is basically disengaged would’ve thought that be problematic absolutely absolutely you so you. That was four years into therapy. How much longer did it take you to move into the world of parliamentary I think maybe couple years later I started yelling. I realized I needed to experience this league. There’s no way you know health to to learn more and experience different. Thanks and we started the really gradual process and Elvis recommend people to do graduate and not jump into it sobe marriage concer made sure that we had great foundation on that. We discussed a lot of things. We really really slowly in terms of opening up. I’m not jumping into anything serious. We also hosted the couple of couples that were practising listen pulley armory In spoke to them so just I think it took us about half a year up when we decided to open up right. It’s not a quick switch. It’s not the yeah Flick of a of a light switch. It’s interesting you talk about feeling like something was wrong with you and your friend telling you something’s wrong with you and even your therapist trying to fix you right With totally unpredictable ending there. And when we talk about monogamy you often hear the term toxic monogamy. And so I know that can be really upsetting for people but toxic monogamy refers to a monogamy in which monogamy is your only choice. It is the sole universal universal only valid option. So there’s absolutely nothing wrong with monogamy monogamy can work for many people. But when it’s forced down on your throat it can be pathological for sure. I completely agree with you. And I love the concept of Heaven. The spectrum of relationship types in front of you on an chosen one of them right so monogamy and then I love how you did you talk on monogamous right and then you go a step further. Maybe do play partners which which don’t even have to be sexual right but if somebody is into kink that could be something they may want to do and then moving more into me be swinging and then going all the way into bulimia which includes it’s not just a sexual connection but the emotional as well. I think it’s beautiful to know all of the options and then pick the one that works and some people were beautifully with monogamy right and it’s is not a linear ascension necessarily ride. There’s not this notion that well we did this one thing. So then we must do the next thing You said something quickly that I just want to get some clarification on you mentioned Incheon play partners that can be non sexual and this would be an kinky setting and I think everybody thinks that kinky means some sort of sex but it’s far more complex and nuanced wants than that absolutely. I completely agree with you. I think A lot of people equate security with Kink but all of the parties that I’ve been to most of them actually are a non sexual and can be so powerful without at the security. Mix into a domination and submission sadomasochism bondage It could be incredible to me. It’s like a leaf experience that be kind of lost from you know being children. Why don’t play anymore so much fun and also it? It adds a dimension to your playwright. It’s not just physical but it’s like all of a sudden you come up with all sorts of Adhd you play the motions and it’s just such a huge range. That emotional camp is my type of Kink. I think that the sex that I have isn’t necessarily physically kinky. I mean it is at times but there’s always been in this emotional kinky side even from when I was a really young sexual person like in my in my late teens. So what does kinky sex mean into you to me.
00:10:02 – 00:15:15
It’s sort of a combination of I think I consider myself Sabio and Demi sexual so it combines multiple dimensions dimensions of Australia. Maybe there’s an idea. There is a role play. Maybe there’s something on triggers you intellectually. That really gets you going to meet so excited. toget- somebody rows without even touching them rages kind of coming up with an idea or connected with an emotionally to the point where they get so vulnerable that it’s actually healing. I think can could would be really healing as well and Include in Shali into it could be another element as well as it’s just kind of Ed in the lower levels in the layers On to connect and deeper. That’s the most and you. You mentioned two terms there that had just want to flesh out for folks. The first was sapio sexual. How do you define not that? You look at me when you say through two terms that we need to flesh out but yes please do it for all the listeners brandon. The Way I would define cyber sexual would be. I’m somebody who needs to be stimulated intellectually and physically in order to get into the mood mood and demo sexual somebody who needs more of emotional connection. I think to some degree. Almost all of us falls into into these categories along the spectrum. Somewhere right because I I always say that every experience is emotional. NACHO sexual. You’re not just the sex sexual experiences but when you go to the dentist it’s emotional when you order your coffee. It’s emotional when I drink this this glass of water in my hand right here. So I’m holding a glass. Yes that is a heavy heavy crystal and for some reason I love to drink out of heavy crystal glass as opposed to say a Paper Cup. And there’s there’s an emotion to that. I’m just glad that you didn’t see you feel sexual at the dentist. ’cause I wonder what they’re doing that you like so much. I know that’s the thing. It’s a very common fetish a very commissary of a very common. I’m in Kink to enjoy dental work so I was in a really cool dungeon I did this event in Switzerland in maybe it was last cheer and this group rented this absurdly high end dungeon Outside of one of their means cities and when I say it was high end I I mean it was like a beautiful loft that you would love to live in and the owner had converted it into a a kink plays. There was a dental room. There was a you know a gas mask room. There was a room where you could do. Suspensions there was a room with a clear. Glass S. toilets so you could watch peeing and pooping. If that’s what you’re into there was actually a room with a clear glass bench it might have been plexiglass lucite or something like that with a hole in it so that you could go to the bathroom and if someone wanted to lie beneath you. I don’t know how I entirely got to this. But oh I was starting with the dental work and and the group I was with was not Kinky Most of them and so they wanted to learn about this kind of a very private setting and they were very confused infused by the dental work but I have a number of folks in in my circle of friends and colleagues who are quite into dental play. Do you run into that often. Very cool I haven’t around into dental flavor such a huge variety of kinks. Exactly now you’ve written many stories as part of your compilation compilation book. Alison Paulie land. That people can find on spirit sex lab DOT COM. And you’re going to share a story with us today at set a Kinky. The story a play story is a group sex story on this. One is a kink party. Actually so there wasn’t on socks But it’s mostly Sort of Cancun media some okay okay. Great and I think it’s a good reminder to like sex means different things to different people so some people can become really sexually aroused from activities that we don’t generally consider from said consider sexual so I’m going to shut up and hand the mic off to get to share her story and the title is decadent. Play party all right. It was a party to remember a medieval dungeon space. The Torture Chamber held so many tools. Gods that Alice was incomplete disbelief an on. was she in the dream or better yet. A nightmare at told beautiful. Dark haired woman was bound to next shaped cross her. Her elegant partner had an arsenal of floors on crops. He was delivering the hits and Gracious and rhythmical movements pleasure on her face was undeniable. I bowl at times. He would connect with her to sense into her world only to resume the central dense fully engrossed into the new and exciting written written upstairs boudoir space contained a few scenes one of which was a road to suspension a young woman bonded and suspended in the air. FLOATIN FLOATIN as entrance experienced rope monster playing with the energy of tightness gravity and flight beedon fantasies into reality and connecting the ropes into exquisite restrained patterns handsome toll.
00:15:15 – 00:20:24
Man With dark wavy hair dominated his partner in the school. Themed Room using two floors interchangeably created the mystical twirling energy pattern tantalized by the scene. All this couldn’t move and just sounds into. The frequency seems the feeling was that of decadent trance central and fluid interconnected dance of energy for a moment should almost fault envious of his partner for the first time in her life was witnessing the pro dome plane with a man. He was tied to medieval chair completely helpless and that her full disposal neck doc wrists feet coughed into a position should Flogger and began sensation. Play confidently with a smile in the calculated. Professional manner should gently increase sensation slop in his nipples thighs feet crotch. The man was STOIC. Latigo in the bean until he could not silently really do it anymore. He started making sounds low growl in Moscow and sounds of an animal. All this intensely felt the scene and almost almost motherly and carry notion came over her. She wanted to free him. Hold him rid him of her even though she knew that he was enjoying this play to her great surprise Alice was aroused at the same time. The energy with which pro don’t dominated him. How shall opened his leather underwear? Franck pocket unexposed host. He speediness how she played with him. Roughly there was a mix of pain and pleasure torture and Care Block in White. There’s it’s no white without the block. Thought all this there’s no light without darkness. Light is only made apparent by the shadows of costs perhaps the real pleasure calms uh-huh income in contrast to pain at tantalize enroll pool of emotions and sensations. Definitely party to remember so. In each of these stories we’re witnessed to Alice experiencing a sensual well or erotic or sexual Or sometimes like painful emotional experience of sharing her partner for the first time or you know jealousy so so the things that you experience go through as you’re exploring polio. Murray or king and are these. Are these your stories are you. Ellis yes yeah so so in the world. I’m always in Poland. That’s my name and so where was this Kanki party. What city was it in? This wasn’t Toronto. ACTUALLY THERE’S A beautiful location downtown Toronto and is it a private club or publicly is like a private party. Young People Rent that That plays in cradles. ABC’s there and if people you’re interested where do they even begin. How do you look for this? In your city on the bus website I would say is at live dot com If you registered there you can see all of the events that are helping in You can also go out to munches which are known sexy non sexual events where you can just meet people And there are a lot of different parties that are happening all over And a happy to guide people into different KINK PARTIES THAT PROVIDE PRIVATE TOURS TO PARTISAN SEX clubs. So that’s also another turn into so let’s start with the munches because munches are just get togethers like you might be at a hamburger joint or a pub and what are you. What are you talking about yes usually POB and it’s maybe about thirty forty people on usually so you just conduct as you would with with anybody at the pop and then you could maybe than deepen into more of a discussion of king of that feels comfortable to you you? You may also be able to meet like minded people do the conversations generally start pretty late and then deviate into. I shouldn’t use that. That were then kind of veer off into kink. Play that you’re interested in. I’m just thinking as somebody who hasn’t been to a month before if I were to go. What would I that? Initial conversation station would be like. Hey Kenya how’re you like. What’s new in your world and then somebody just starts talking about the king that they’re into is that how it works? Yeah I I guess they would feel into it registered with anything on that. I guess. That’s the overarching in trust with people so eventually you would probably ask. What are you looking for here? Or what brings you here around. You may dive onto a look into experience this or I would love to connect with the with this person but sometimes people just come out m just as France and they they just hang out together on the interest Okubo kids right just life your life in general because you can be Kinky and still just have your regular job where you’re a teacher sure or you’re a gardener definitely so if you begin with the Munch we often recommend that people begin with a much because there’s no pressure you’re at a regular bar where there is not a scene like you just described right in your story and then you can get to know people in the community you can probably find out about upcoming events you know you had mentioned fat life dot Com and being a great place to go through a great resource for sure.
00:20:24 – 00:25:01
Yeah and you can also meet people online. They’re all just kind of research Lucan two two different profiles meet people that way as wall and learn about different kinks as Walder’s breadth of information there. That’s one of my favorite things about king communities is that there’s this ongoing learning and really clear communication oftentimes with regard to what you want so if you if you put in your profile on on tinder under or grinder or where else on any of these dating APPs. You’re not necessarily saying what you’re into specifically but I do find in the kink world. People are a little a bit more specific not only with our likes and dislikes but sometimes with our densities and so if you were to move from fat life to a real life club do you recommend recommend people go to a club with a tour guide like yourself for the first time like a king come party. Yeah Yeah Dr. Douglas suggests Zog because it’s sort of a software Linden right I usually do guided tours whereas small group of people and at Doku Qingcai educate them and then we do a scene usually a fun scene when I bring model and we can experience different things together. Like one of our scenes was I was teaching prostate stimulation and there was a girl who was like into tick land so the tickle torture And that’s fun for people to see how you can discuss the boundaries because we always go through the list of Yes no and maybe and with the model and so you know I asked her. What is the key for me to do? What is the key for the participants to do and So they kind of learned that way and then they can stay at the party and enjoy it so it’s a bit of a softer Clinton. Yeah I think it’s a really great idea anytime you’re going into a new environment so if you’re GONNA go ski for the first time it any new any new skill or foray into new territory. Are you generally go with some sort of a guide. Even when I land in a city I always try and find a guide to show me around. Show me the architecture. Show me the history and it’ll be. I don’t think we take the same team. Practical approach to anything Roddick or sensual. Because we’re just not as practical about it so you do these tours and clubs all over Toronto but if people wanted to bring you into to their city they could also do the same where you could connect with the club and take them on a on a tour of a specific evening Very cool so they’re gonNA find you. It’s spirit sex ex- LAB DOT COM Pittsburgh so we go back to our story. There was a lot going on. Yeah there was and I can only imagine how that was. Was that story based on one of your first experiences in the world. I think this was like my first kink party uh-huh and what stands out most significantly about that memory I was just incredibly moved by the energy that People Exchange Blake Hall vulnerable. The experiences are called moving. How emotionally A tie they were to each other in cases where there were regular working parties re King King partners I was also amazed at the depths of the exploration. You can see the King Party right. There could aerob- it could be impactfully could domination submission And I always try to be open and non-judgmental in terms of like every single experience that I see so there could be some pain All sorts of different things right And it’s just great to push. I think that open the envelope push push the boundaries and just step the part of your comfort zone a little bit. I think it allows you to grow as well. So many people practice kink in private. But it’s also something that we can engage in in public. Do you think there’s a real advantage to going to a kink play party as opposed to just practicing at home I think so. I mean I think Big Part of it is also exhibition. Right which a lot of people enjoy ahead myself. Incredible moving experiences with gang doing in public and being seen the DOTS and Like one of the experiences was the person who introduced me to the scene. He’s like defoe comfortable being naked. And I’m like well and he said why don’t you undressed and slowly blue. Walk around the swimming pool and make eye contact with people and to me. It wasn’t incredibly moving experience. I was like Oh my God. It really affects the way you feel. And your confidant dance and imagine have in the scene where people are watching you and you’re having this intense experience and you make in the Narcan dogs just like takes it to a next level. I think it’s just just incredible in terms of personal growth and Learning more about yourself and of course kinky sex like all sex require choir some preparation.
00:25:01 – 00:30:11
So if you’re brand new to this you’re hearing the story. What is the how to? What’s the first step in terms of figuring out what you’re into and how to communicate that to partners owners? There’s actually a great test online on. If you Google kind of sexual deviant am I you will find a test and gives you sort of basic questions and at the end is going to come up with the black screen that gives you your percentages very calm untested people take and then post on foot life profile. It’s an easy way to identify who you are in terms of the B- DSM And they’d be stands for bondage and disciplined under his domination submission. And then there’s Somoza Chism so you kind of identify what you’re into a little bit And then you could go to play parties and watch people play and also talk to them and see what you’re into as well and make sure you go in various slowly and that you’re staying safe safe Make sure that you know the person you’re playing with. There’s usually a dungeon morning third every party. which is the person who’s responsible for safety? So make sure you blend in front of that. A person and Just learn as much as you can both your preferences in the edges go-slow limb. And if you’re going to start using equipment it’s not as simple as oh I’d like to use a whip. Let me get a single tail with and pull this thing out. You’ll need to be shown how to use these tools for sure. Yeah not a workshop or would another great thing about the king on steam. As you mentioned people will teach you so there are a lot of. Let’s see dominatrix or more Donna. People were like tops. Who will be happily teaching you to use the web or showing you? Thanks Sharing with your all of their toys and explaining what they ars so that’s also another way but definitely to invest time to learn this. It’s like an art form. It is and the toys R. There’s an endless array of toys from from knives two cups to electro play Two whips and flavors and all the different apparatus. So it’s not as simple as I just want to. You know I think people think Wannabe Kinky today and of course Kinky is however UC kink right. I hate the idea that vanilla is a pejorative afraid like the kinky is cool in Vanilla is boring. It’s just this big not even spectrum but a Web Right and you can locate yourself anywhere on that web right. But what What specific traffic tips do you have? Based on the story you just read us. Well actually let me T- glued because each story does have practical tips so here I’m suggesting to learn more about negotiate and scenes so there’s a will won’t and maybe list that you need to go through. These are things that you will definitely want to try the things that you may want to try and think that you definitely will not do there’s CSS protocol which is consensual safe and seen as you need to make sure that old all dictators are consensual and safe insane. I’m also recommended in to get a mentor and There’s usually a code of conduct. That doc You need to learn about address. Code applies to a lot of king parties rules And also keep in mind that sometimes King parties have different themes right suey. If you’re into something specific let’s see dominant women’s submissive males right. There is a theme for that. Or maybe if there is rope Experience is what you’re looking for than others the theme for that just kind of look for specific party and rope place so beautiful. It’s such a gorgeous art. And these are exhibitions exhibitions that you can go observe at many sex clubs neither incredible yell for sure you can do so. Many things rope Suspensions just look like an art it right where you you change the person different suspension. Have you guys heard of connective rope. It’s incredible it’s the way. The person applies rope. It’s so sad. Show shoulder way. They would like Ronald against your neck or like against a nipple or how the sensually or roughly apply it right. It’s like they can channel the domination submission into it or even the pain component of what you’re in Tucson loved the connective robe. You know. I often recommend that every a person couple throughout the whole group at least consider going to a sex club but I think it would be useful for every single person to go to kink party because of all the I think subversive emotions that are involved in canc right so when we think of sex we think of love and pleasure and excitement and passion. But we don’t often think about all the other feelings that are tied to sex for many of us and I’ve I’ve talked about about this before for me jealous. See for some people humiliation right for some people degradation and I think we’re really missing out so certainly recommend that people the run off to a kink play party tonight but at least consider it even if it hasn’t been on your radar but it also these king seems that you just made reference to also outline have a lot of other elements that you’ve talked about with in relationships communicating like having don’t lists have your do groups But you don’t play.
00:30:12 – 00:35:23
That was Brooklyn nine. Nine Reverend. Show me all my brand new crew do groups instead of task force. But it’s just the idea that you’re communicating hitting all this event. So I get the feeling that even if I was nervous going to my first kink partier my first party in Cancun world that a lot of the terms terms would already be predetermined before I even arrived which would likely alleviate a lot of concern about what can happen or what is going to play out. Sure you’re now another topic that you talk often about. And you’ve written about in Allison Poland is energy orgasms and so you do work with energy. What does that mean to be an energy therapist So the quantum physics tells us that. We’re all comprised of large vibrational field of energy. And so if you really Kinda feel into that idea and there is like nine thousand nine point nine nine percent of space and us so we’re not really matter and B. Teak or sounds sells were granted. We think that’s like a lot of us. Just kind of look at ourselves and me think Oh my God it’s like this is matter but really there is a lot more Qantas nuts inside of us And so if you believe that line of thought. Consciousness is primary and matter secondary and so everything that happens to us all of the let’s see blockages that VR VR creed older thought Potter’s old. The belief systems they could all be located on the energy field in our energy field in our energy as centers system stupid can learn to sense into it We can learn to trial could better We can experience yet. Don’t connect closer to ideas ideas that caused for example. If that’s what you’re into and you can also use that energy to experience energy or Gaza which is this profound multidimensional phenomena China. You can do a touch free and it’s just incredible and You just feel like you’re one with the universe You May Experience Search Deep Union with your partner and so so many different things. How much practice does it take to have one of these? Just because someone who’s never had that I know of an energy orgasm sounds like a lot of work. It’s really worth it for sure In order to receive an energy orgasmic typically takes me six hours to teach the person and in beacon themselves usually nine out of ten people. At that point we’ll have unorganized. There are people who may acquire more time just because they need to kind of become more more sensitive or tune into the energy but more sometimes they have blockages that are preventing the energy from like moving all the way up so the energy me kind of get stuck in the throat road on a so but typically Alex recessions of two hours gives you all the theory and practice and so when you say touch Louis Orgasms are you by yourself. Are you with a partner. Are you with a group you could be completely by yourself and Have this experience. You could have it with a partner. Then it’s really amplified defied. I feel incredible depth It could be in the group and then it’s even stronger right so we don’t have six hours. But where do we begin if we want to explore explorer touch less orgasms. I have Quite a few videos on my youtube channel outlined different steps. You guys can watch at home. But basically it’s a combination. The Nation all from tune into sense energy low better. Do you WanNa take us through some practical exercise time you had talked about a multidimensional mentioned body scan. Does that fit here. Sure you can do that. So can you tell us what that is. And then maybe give us a mini version. I know normally that would take half an hour. But what is a multi alty dimensional body scan. Yes so the bodies Coun- is when you close your eyes and you started breathing kind of slowly and you just tune into your whole body Ardi starting from the feet and going all the way up and you basically notice what is happening inside of you on four different levels so it could be the physical level it could be energetic. Clavel could be emotional level and also your skin for any thoughts or anything like that And I usually use it in the first portion to teach the person to WHO Truck the energy a little bit better and also identifying that blockages that they may have and you would be surprised at the things that you see or notice or experience durians. Do you think we could try that for a couple minutes restaurant or just again. It’s going to be a bit of a truncated version. But YOU WANNA do it but it’s okay okay. Great so I’m going to ask you to close your eyes if that feels comfortable for you and plant your feet on the grounds and usually it’s best to do it either laying down or just sit in with your spine straight and folks. You can try this right now as well beautiful and I want want you to start by taking a few deep breaths into your time means so as Sloan breath scene and then hold colonel vets in the slow breath out through your mouth another deep breath into your stomach hold fertile.
00:35:23 – 00:40:35
That’s slowly breathe through your mouth and now start to focus in on your feet. Just start breathing out of the soles of your feet. It and as you’re doing that I want you to start noticed ending. Endeavor physical sensations that you may experience there so just notice if you feel coolness wermuth he moisture dryness and also where your attention goes. This is where the energy goes so much to start syncing into the sort of energetic level. That may feel maybe like pressure England. Perhaps it feels like having this start focusing on that connection at did you feed. They’re making with the floor and they wanted to also visualizes those. You have a mind screen in your head between your eyes and just kind of allows you to see things. They will just come to you if they need to show anything. So can we start now journey up your legs and so you’re going to scan your lower legs just notice. All of the physical physical sensation may be the tightness. Hurry Lac st warm and also feel into the space around your lower legs. I just noticed that kind of frequency the energy all around you just till noon to a slight slight vibration. Perhaps and also you can seeing in your mind screeners vom and typically start seeing more as you come up to your upper thighs in your arm outer thighs your inner thighs were going to scan your buttocks and NEOM just get in touch with your Janet Santos and the lowest stomach. Just GonNa notice what it is that you see or you feel. Let me know if anything is Speaking to you feel become curious voting thing I notice anything just anything in your lower stomach Dhamma core the perignon them. Hi have some tension in my left leg Feels good feels relaxed grief which may be it. Hasn’t been for a little bit a Ha so purposefully bringing my attention to it and my breath to it Hill sketch and and so when you’re scannings were sort of the lower stomach. The lower back that type of area usually energetically contains a lot of walk. Aeges that have to do with Taymor guild any type of judgments around sexuality anything that’s preventing the flow of energy and as removing up to the solar plexus. This is responsible for the self esteem. The self confidence. The heart area is responsible for connecting with our loved ones. So just let me know if you experienced anything or noticed anything interesting to me. Be Seen something interesting there. I don’t know if you want to chime in I can say I have a little tightness in my chest. That’s been hanging out for about a week. I have a little bit of tightness in my chest in my heart but those because there have been moments of sadness sadness over the last year. I also thought a couple of really weird thoughts when we first started thought about marbles and Broccoli so I have no idea where where my brain is going but it’s I need some help apparently right now I’m thinking about rock. Think about how’s Marbles Broccoli and we’re going very quickly right and we’re also talking about all sorts of things. It’s a bit heartened to focus but would brandon has Kind of mentioned the the pain sadness in the heart rate. That’s what we start kind of discovering the tightness has just said and then emotions Shawn’s and as we dive into them I typically ask people to give it a voice on to tell you why there to try see an image of who is speaking to you so you kind of dive into deeper exploration different emotions in different parts of you that live inside of you on where that comes from I know I feel heaviness not just tightness but heaviness and sadness and It was one a year ago right now that our dog was diagnosed and we started the treatment.
00:40:35 – 00:45:03
Don’t ask me Babe. He’s touching me and so the last a few days have been hard. I haven’t been super sad over the death of the dog. It was last April so eight or nine months ago but right now the last week I’ve been really sad over and so that makes me tight on my chest It makes me tighten my public floor as well as I hold a lot of tension there there a great awareness and it’s been affecting my sleep which affects of course your body rightly if you don’t sleep. Well you wake up with us while I wake up with a sore neck who you’re on so each time you encounter something painful or scary just kind of keep reason into it and keep experience base element without looks like for you that pain that lives inside of your heart and also in your policies era a visual. That comes up zero voice. Does it say anything. Maybe the sound silly truthfully all in thinking about is my Pomeranian. Yup Her little shape. I also have a lot of excitement in my body. Yeah we’re does that living you at in my chest too. Oh yeah does it look like Would it see if you were to give it a voice. I like taking off a plane movement. Change Thrill adrenaline Beautiful it’s somethin’. An and so normally you’d spend probably thirty minutes just on this. Yes yes we would be with also during ways to deal with that you could learn to. Maybe you could try to Open up your hearts if you want to try tried to me if you could start breeding until heart into specializes beautiful you know Maybe your your dog gory. Your loved ones anyone Who brings joy and love to use starts creed in that inside of your chest and blooming out just like a flower expanded beautiful law found conditional love out into the universe and also saying until parts of you that are hurt him and let me know if it’s changing your state of being low but let me know if anything is happening? Has you’re doing that in the pure able talks. Assad I like visualization breathing like a flower blooming in the chest opening opening up. My shoulders in my chest doesn’t make me feel a little later. I also think about my physical comfort on won’t take Bra off. It’s such a reminder minder how much your physical comfort is so important. Yeah and so when you open your heart center sometimes we feel a lot of pressure openness rate and just kind kind of allows you to sense into the energy that lives there and that could be very healing. What I think says that if if I had more time and maybe more? Privacy of fewer microphones This is something I can use and I can. I need and I’ve had over the past couple of years a couple of opportunities where I felt really comfortable in space and I felt this huge release once was over the summer at the US now conference Sexual Health Conference for women of Color Very small focused conference in Hamilton. -Tario and I remember just feeling kind of outpouring during a similar exercise. A body scan I think I’m able to feel more of course when I don’t have a responsibility to anybody else talking here for other people’s benefit as well But I still certainly feel emotionally can see I’m of course wiping my my tears away which is typical for me? But I think I I need to create more space in my life just to be in my body and feel what I’m feeling I think from me the language might be different from energy But the feeling is probably the same rights.
00:45:03 – 00:49:11
I think that like. Maybe I’m an English major English teacher. Language means so much to me the N.. Words obviously mean different things to different people so I think that maybe I don’t know what the word is for me I think it’s sort of like a presence and federal mindfulness. That’s the language that appeals. To me your I don’t know about you Brendan. I really enjoyed the first half after I go to over Broccoli and marbles uh-huh focused in on how it was feeling but like you said when I got to the the upper half of my body. I felt a lot attention on my chest but when I noticed was I think because we’re you’re in this recording setting that I pushed back of course I think that if I really did lean into those feelings I too have been you know had had my days in my moments quite a few of them over the last year having had lost our dog that I would probably break down I would and and is just so my response rate here right now is to push back. Yeah and just to not go there. Of course yeah. It’s it’s very vulnerable experience. It could take you very deep and then it moves things right because emotions derelict energy waves and we need to process them into let go and then when they leave there is more space created for Whatever else you want to fill it was on? I have a free meditation on my website. it’s body. Scans if people want to download it. They may enjoy it as well. It’s the twenty minutes of me. Walking them through the artist can experience and we’ll we’ll put a link to that as well It when we take this back to experiences of sex and and sex meaning not just pleasure and orgasm but connection right because sex really does mean a lot of different things to many different people people. I can see how this type of exercise applies at least twofold. I’m sure it applies in many ways but for me I think about in preparation kind of preparing your body if this becomes a part of your daily ritual or weekly ritual right whether you do it for a minute at the start of the day or you take thirty minutes once a week. Whatever fits into your lifestyle? I can see your senses being heightened your body being more responsive and more more potentially open but then also knowing when you’re not right so it’s not just about welcoming pleasure in welcoming connection it’s also just about knowing where your body is being able to say like not not today today. I don’t even WANNA snuggle right associate applying there but I also see it applying in like not just being a foundation Dacian for sex but applying in sexual experiences and you had mentioned that you also do an exercise for connection That it is something that we could further explore so like every episode we get to scratched the surface and hopefully encourage you to keep the conversation addition going. I really feel that that that’s what I can do. I can give people permission to explore a broad range of topics even if not every single one is for you and I encourage you to keep the conversation going so oh encourage you to to keep exploring I certainly encourage you to check out allison polly land and spirit spirit sex lab for some of the resources on your website your youtube tube channel as well if this is something you want to explore and I also WanNa just offer an additional encouragement sort of for people like me if you feel off put put by like the language of energy or if it’s not your cup of tea immediately that’s when I would suggest you explore it just a little further because sometimes I think when we resist things. It’s because there’s something in it that scares us and can be more powerful and more moving so thank you thank you so much for that thing for him me vitiated so thank you for listening. Thanks for joining us you. Yeah we’ll be back next Friday and every Friday with another episode wherever you’re at have a great one You’re listening to the sex with Dr Jazz podcast improve your sex life breath improve your life.