Lessons from the Together Tour:
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1. You CAN teach an old dog new tricks. One septegenarian couple drove 5 hours from Michigan to Columbus, OH to attend our event! Their secret after 50+ years of marriage? It’s never too late to try new things. “I’m 74 and I’m doing things I never thought I’d be doing. We’re here to learn about all of our options.”
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2. Don’t try to merge identities. This one came from a couple in their 20s: “Once we stopped trying to be the same person, we finally started getting along. We were trying too hard to agree on everything, but everything changed for the better when we let difference feel safe.”
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3. Remember your FUN self. “I was so much fun in my 20s and honestly, I got so caught up with kids and work in my 30s and 40s that I stopped being FUN. I’m so glad I found my way back in my 50s becuase I feel so much lighter and honestly, it’s what kick-started by libido again.”

3 More Lessons from happy couples aboard the Desire Cruise:

1. “Celebrate predictability. Of course we love spontanaiety, but we also celebrate the little rituals that we’ve come to count on. He wakes up earlier, but as soon as he hears that I’m up, he comes to find me for a morning hug. And I’m really good about sending texts to let him know I’m thinking of him every single day. It’s the predictable moments that make everything else (like the escapades on this cruise!) possible.”

2. “Say this out loud when you’re arguing: ‘What do you need me to understand right now?’ This has completely changed the way we handle conflict. We realized we were both arguing to be understood, so now we just say that out loud. It moves us away from trying to be right and it’s really a life-changer.”
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3. “Rethink what ‘good sex’ means. For years we thought it had to be all about intensity, noise, movement, positions, big finishes. Now we’ve learned that it’s best when we feel completely attuned, even if it’s slow or quiet or a release. We stopped measuring it and started really feeling it. That’s when it got amazing again.”